Burdens

When I was between twelve and fourteen years old I started watching Naruto. This anime helped me think in the ways I do now, and introduced me to the concept of hardships that I never got from reading the comedical fiction books I read: Diary of Wimpy Kid, Warriors. One concept it was quite ubiquitous with was burdens. Today, thanks to a friend I came across the concept again, and decided I should write about it today, specifically burdens in the form of problems. In this writing I’ll address what it means to steal problems, why not to, and what you can do instead. Stealing problems is exactly what it sounds like. You are literally taking someone's adversities and making them your own. At first you believe this is fine, that you are helping someone with the catharsis of relieving them of their adversity, however, the problem does not disappear. It now becomes your problem, a problem that you have to hold in your hands, until you can find a way to solve it. Unfortunately though, if you have a habit of stealing problems, you've took so many problems, and in your hands is now probably many problems from many people. The insidious cycle will not allow you the time to solve these problems, and you usually you don't know how to either. Other people's adversities are not yours, there is no will to solve them, and you are now just carrying them, holding them. The negative energy will slowly start to course through you. You think that you're helping people, that there's a positive net, but this is not true. I think you can already surmise as to why this is a very negative thing. These problems you steal end up hurting you, and causing you pain. The terrible thing is, those that do this usually think that you're doing a good thing, but in reality, this is a win-lose situation, and in life the only situations you want to have with people is win-win. If it's a win-lose situation there is not a positive net, there is a neutral one, the positive of someone losing their problems is balanced by the negative of you obtaining pain that you cannot rid. The moral of those two paragraphs is that you shouldn't be doing this, do not steal other's problems, but in saying that I will also offer you advice on what I believe should be done in place of this abysmal method. Instead of stealing people's problems, you should help them solve their problems, the only problem with that is that you have to know how to. I recommend you understand how you can help people solve their problems, I also say pragmatic solutions are the way to go when you cannot empathize with their problems. Other than that, do not be a "yes" man. Meaning don't just say yes to people, don't let them get away with things, if you have someone you care about, and they're doing something stupid, tell them that what they're doing is stupid and how it will negatively impact them. You have to help people learn from their mistakes, you cannot just say, "it's ok." to every problem they have, and that you learn about. You need to put your foot down, say it's not ok, be mad at them or disappointed go ahead, make sure they understand what they did was not ok, and then, fix it with them. There will then be a win-win, you help someone, you feel good, and someone got their problem solved, they feel good. All positive.

That’s all for this post, I hope it helped open the eyes of the extremely kind people that are reading this, that may take part in this pseudo positive action. Specifically that it taught you about how you steal problems, why you shouldn’t do this, and other things you should do in replacement of stealing problems. For those of you who aren’t as nice, and just laugh at people with problems, I hope this gave you an easy way to help someone after you get bored of laughing. With that said this is where I’ll leave off, I will see you next week, have an amazing one, peace.

Original

#changes #emotions